Does "Trying" Make You Feel Annoying?
We were on our coaching call when my client said, “I don’t want to keep emailing about my offer because I’m afraid people will think I'm annoying and unsubscribe.”
I get it. For many service providers, marketing yourself over and over again can feel uncomfortable. The fear of rejection is a heavy weight that, at best, slows you down, and at worst, stops you in your tracks.
Have you ever held back from sharing your work out of fear of being “too much” or “annoying” or (God forbid) “cringe”?
Your goals are important to you, and you feel called to make an impact through your work, but you're holding yourself back from boldly taking action because your fear of judgement and rejection is SO LOUD.
So you try to move forward while also protecting yourself, which looks like feigning nonchalance while making half-hearted attempts towards your goals.
Meanwhile, all you're doing is keeping yourself stuck and letting the potential opinion of others determine your results.
Results you dream about experiencing, like:
Getting paid well to do work you love
Having confidence in your ability to run a successful business
Making a positive impact on others
Feeling proud of yourself
Experiencing fulfillment in your daily life..
Results that are possible when you dare to fully try.
Speaking from my own experience, it can be scary and vulnerable to be seen trying. To put yourself out there over and over and over again. You have to continually step out into uncertainty with courage, trusting that the path will appear. And if it doesn’t, knowing you’re capable of getting back up, dusting yourself off, and choosing to take another step.
Remember, the sting of rejection is not only possible, it's part of the process. Which is one reason why success requires intentional mindset shifts.
If you're holding yourself back from growing your business or going after something you really want in your life, because you're afraid of being annoying or cringe, you're probably doing two things:
1. Thinking about yourself way too much.
Like my client, I bet the service or product you offer genuinely serves your customers wellbeing. When people sign up or buy it, it transforms their lives in meaningful ways. Shifting your perspective to how important your work is for others can dampen fear and help you show up confidently.
2. Creating negative stories about what will happen.
Your brain loves to fill in gaps with stories. Storytelling is powerful, not just in marketing but in human culture. We pass down beliefs, values, and fears through stories. And the stories you now tell yourself have the greatest influence on your life.
We’re also naturally wired for negativity bias because our brains keep us safe by alerting us to potential dangers. It takes intentional effort to rewire your mindset. To replace fear with courage and doubt with faith in your purpose and capabilities.
So, when negative scenarios start to fill those gaps in times of uncertainty, instead of thinking, “If I email again, they’ll be annoyed,” or “No one will respond,” pause and remember that you might not be able to fully control the outcome, but you can control your narrative.
Imagine what would change if your story about taking the next bold action was, “This could be what actually moves my dream client or customer to take action,” or “This product will make their life so much easier.”
I gave my client, who was experiencing that fear, a challenge: Talk about your offer so much that you start feeling annoyed by yourself. Then, we’ll work through that feeling together.
We’ll embrace the discomfort, rewrite that story in your mind, and help your nervous system expand so that taking up more space feels safer.
And she did. She sent more emails and kept showing up. Instead of focusing on fear and uncertainty, she focused on the value she knew she could provide and how that would benefit her clients. She worked through her story and rewired her mindset.
After a few weeks of consistent action, she messaged me to share that someone signed up for her offer. I was so proud of her. Not only was it a win for her business, but the fact that she pushed past her discomfort and stayed consistent helped rewire her mindset. The best part about that is, when she needs to show up boldly in the future, it will feel so much easier.
It was beautiful proof that, by showing up with courage and perseverance, she is capable of creating the success and results she desires.
This reminded me of a recent email I received from someone. I’d reached out to her months ago because I was curious about her services but didn't immediately book a call.
She kept reaching out with thoughtful follow-ups, and I never once thought, “Ugh, she's so annoying.” Instead, I thought, “Oh, I’ve been meaning to book a call, but life got busy!”
Last week, we finally found a time to connect, and we're working on something together soon that I’m very excited about.
Growth is uncomfortable. Expansion feels hard. But when you remember that your goals aren’t just about achievement, but also the value you offer and the impact you can make, you’ll find the courage you need to keep showing up.
So let your new story be that, every time you choose to show up and boldly go after your goals, you get one step closer to making the life you dream about become your reality.
I’m cheering you on.
If you want to embody the most confident, successful, and authentic version of yourself, click below and I’ll send you a free guided visualization to help you step into your Ideal Self in 10-minutes.
